6 Easy Ways To Hide Your Inner Garbage Person

6 Ways To Look Put Together

Ditch the ponytail/messy bun for a side bun. Spray your side part with dry shampoo, then pull all your hair loosely to one side, secure the non-bun side with a single bobby pin to keep from having fly-aways, and do the usual messy bun on the other side, just below your ear. Add dangly earrings. Quick. Chic. Wear it on a date. Wear it to work. Wear it to church. Go crazy.

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Same amount of time and effort. Perfect for those of us in denial about our root situations.

 

 

Put self-tanner on your face, neck and chest. It’s fast, makes your skin look healthier, your teeth look whiter, and you can get dressed right away. My favorite.

 

Line your lips. This is a must for me, but I’ve noticed that a lot of my friends don’t bother with it. TRUST me. Lipliner is the new eyeliner. I buy the cheap ones in nude tones so I can keep one in my makeup drawer and one in my purse and they will work with any color lipstick or gloss (think Rimmel, Wet’n’Wild, etc.) Resist the temptation to buy the ones that don’t need sharpening. They’re convenient, but they don’t last nearly as long as the ones you have to sharpen.

 

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That’s a scab in my nose from having to blow it so much due to allergies. But I love you so I’m keeping it real and posting what appears to be a picture of me with an enormous booger. Could I go back and crop it out? Yes. Do I have the time or energy for that? Nope.

 

 

Don’t rely on your workout clothes as a go-to if you’re not actually working out. It’s so tempting to put on yoga pants and a zip up when we’re feeling blah, but that’s actually when you should toss on your favorite jeans, a button down, and some booties. I own exactly two button downs. One is from Old Navy and one is from Forever 21,  both are older than my 2nd daughter.

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Add a scarf. It makes you look instantly put together. Stella and Dot scarves are THEE best scarves ever. You can wear them tons of ways, including as a dress or pool cover up. True story, once I was wearing a beautiful silk white shirt with a scarf and I spilled red wine all over my white shirt so I just took it off in the bathroom and wrapped my scarf around me like a top. (This also allowed me to rinse the shirt before the stain set. Bonus.) Shop my favorites HERE and HERE. Wear them all year round. (Don’t forget you can always shop with me through http://www.StellaDot.com/emilykuhlman – DM me if you’d like my two cents!)

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Rethink baseball caps. I have tons of them. You will most likely find me in my KC Royals cap. When I got it my bestie had blinged out the logo with crystals, but they fell off over the years so now it’s just my plain, perfectly-broken-in, goes-with-anything, covers-my-greasy-roots, makes-me-look-like-I-care-about-the-sports cap. *I prefer hair-down to ponytails. Efficient on windy days, and doesn’t require ANY hairstyling.

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I urge you to resist the workout clothes and messy top-knots and tell me if it improves your day! There’s no need to feel frumpy just because you haven’t washed your hair in five days or gone shopping in five years. It might even boost your mood or score a compliment. Just know that no matter what you wear, you’ll always be the same beautiful garbage person in my eyes.

(You can find me on IG @MrsKansasMommy)

3 Beauty Routine Time-Savers

I love a shortcut so I’m sharing a few with you in hopes that they may make your day a little bit less stressful.

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Tired Mommy Skincare

Let’s start with the pros and cons of washing your face…

Pro: Skin feels and looks great, fewer wrinkles, no smudges on pillowcases and you don’t wake up looking like an 80s country star on her first day of rehab.

Con: Washing. It’s wet and uncomfortable. AND you have to bend over the sink and try not to imagine that while your eyes were shut a serial killer snuck into your bathroom and is standing behind you waiting for you to see him in the mirror as you dry off your face. (Full disclosure, right as I typed that my dog George jumped up from the floor and I nearly fell out of my chair. A vivid imagination is my gift and my curse.)

Also, if you’re already in bed you have to get out of bed and that’s usually just not happening. So what to do? I’ve started keeping make up remover wipes and night cream on my actual nightstand. That way if I’m feeling particularly lazy tired I can still do a little skincare routine without having to get out of bed.

Tired Mommy Skincare

No-White-Strip Teeth Whitening

I discovered this toothpaste at Walmart and it’s great as a regular toothpaste, but sometimes when I need an extra boost, I rub the paste on my teeth (with my finger) and then leave it on while I shower. It gets all sudsy and then I brush my teeth as normal.

Beauty Hack Teeth Whitening

Busy Mommy Makeup

The best trick I’ve learned to get out the door fast is to keep your products to a minimum. It’s amazing how much time you waste hunting for different things in your makeup drawer.

I start with three basic products:

Beauty Hack Before

Step 1: BB Cream

Step 2: Mascara

Step 3: Blush on the apples of my cheeks

I could stop here, but it’s the fourth step that makes me feel pulled together, especially when my hair is pulled back.

Step 4: Bronzer.

Beauty Hack Contour

This is what I used for everything you see here:

Contour Product

I’ve found it doesn’t really matter what “color” or product you use, as long as you choose a neutral matte brown powder and apply it in the right areas with the right size brushes. For example, I use a heavy hand on the eyelids and a light touch on the sides of my nose. I do a little heavier under my cheekbones with a thick brush and then use a skinny brush to blend it softly around my lips to make them appear larger.

If you guys are interested in this, I will post more of the different products I’ve used because I have a drawer full of all different formulas and price points.

Busy Mommy Makeup

Hope these are some tips that can work for you too. And yes, that is my child’s hand clutching at me while I was trying to take a selfie for this post. Hence, in the words of Plato, necessity is the mother of invention… and I am the mother of a grabby 4-year-old. (Most people don’t realize he said that last part.)